What are you on about now?
As I ventured home from London today, I noticed a few interesting people. You know, just chillin’ and taking advantage of the city’s extensive public transportation system.
First of all, we have the narcissistic females. AKA “I have myself as my phone background” and “I’m a gorgeous Asian who needs to check her make-up via snapchat every 5 minutes.” Both women were seated on a dimly lit platform…with their boyfriends. Really makes you wonder what type of man can handle someone so self involved.
Upon arrival to the airport…
There was a very slow family in front of me that I couldn’t manage to get around. We ALL know the type, have to walk side by side slowly and not let anyone through. Getting fed up and rolling my eyes a tad bit, I noticed that the son’s pants were actually below his arse cheeks. BELOW….how on earth is that comfortable. Thank god his t-shirt was long enough in the front, who knows what anyone headed towards us could see. It was bad enough the kid was walking like a penguin.
I’m going to say it now because I lived there for 11 years and I’m allowed.
There’s the loud and quizzical kiddos obsessed with their new football trading cards, the cleanly dressed quiet types, the sloppily dressed loud buggers, and the toothpick behind each year pretty boy.
If I wasn’t so intent on finishing the book I brought with me, I would have totally zoned out and created a back-story for each and every one of them. Toothpick stood out. Not just because he was a pretty boy. Because his need to chew on toothpicks made me wonder if he was trying to quit smoking or if he was just trying to keep his mind off smoking until he was outside again.
Arse Cheeks on the other hand made me think about something else.